Dear Peppa Pig,
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
(Note to readers unfamiliar with Peppa: ‘Peppa Pig’ is a TV show, which has inexplicable powers of preschool mind control… in a good way… I think.)
1. Jumping in muddy puddles
This skill is dreadfully important during an east coast low.
Practising this skill will also assist when passing buses splash mud all over small children. Just laugh and remind them of their hero Peppa Pig’s affection for mud and how lucky they are to have it splattered on their faces.
2. Group guffawing whilst lying on backs
Hilariously, at the end of many episodes, Peppa, George and their friends and family, end up lying, cockroach-like, on their backs, giggling hysterically.
“Why do they fall over, Mummy?”
“They just laugh so hard they can’t stand up!”
Can anything beat rolling on the floor, laughing? I don’t think so. ROFL beats LOL.
3. Peppa Pig has a car-boat
Never, since Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, have we seen such effective transformative transportation.
Plus, skull and crossbones. Pirates = cool.
4. Laughs for the mums and dads
Irony: In my favourite episode, which is my favourite episode because I’m a great big greenie, the Pig family go camping, and Daddy Pig pulls out a TV so he can watch a nature documentary about a bird. He shoos an actual, real bird (that’s shoos, not shoots) who perches atop the TV, as it is interrupting his view of the birdy nature onscreen. Later, at the insistence of the eternally-clever Mummy Pig, he realises the error of his ways, turns off the TV and enjoys a picnic at the highly-entertaining “Duck Land”.
I’m not sure that the kids get the irony, but they do understand that jumping in muddy puddles is hilarious.
See point one.
I couldn’t get Google to cough up a picture of this, sorry.
Hilarious jokes at Daddy’s expense: Daddy’s big fat tummy and smelly socks are particular standouts. Fun for mums everywhere. Here, Daddy’s big fat tummy prevents him from entering the cubby house. In an amusing twist, the secret code words to gain entry to the cubby house are, “Daddy’s big fat tummy”. Well, it’s either that or, “Daddy’s smelly socks”. It’s something derogatory about Daddy. Luckily, Daddy Pig doesn’t mind a joke at his own expense. Daddy Pig is a good sport. A big, oafish, clumsy good sport. Hilarious.
Oinking: Oinking is very funny. (Note that the camera shake during each oink in the opening credits increases exponentially with the size of the pig. That’s for you, mums and dads.)
5. Five-minute episodes
This is the piece de resistance. Perfection in 300 seconds.
Oh, I found the Camping Holiday episode! It’s 300 seconds well-spent, I guarantee.
The process: grab their attention with simply drawn characters and primary colours, make them laugh at funny British accents and highly entertaining jokes about being fat and smelly, jump in muddy puddles, fall about guffawing, and present a subtle, yet important, message, such as “don’t take a leaky boat out to sea”, or “you can’t always trust a GPS”, or “if you miss the school bus your teacher will drive you”, or “overdue library books are funny”, or “gazelles are French, because ‘gazelle’ seems like a French word”, or “steep hills are no match for a pig-powered tandem bike”, or “potatoes are funniest if they speak with a Spanish accent”. Clearly, I’m well versed.
When the closing credits roll (cue the glockenspiel), they’re screaming for more. Ah, iView, I salute you.
Thanks, Peppa Pig. You saved my bacon!
Me (on behalf of mums and dads everywhere)
Do you have a favourite ‘Peppa Pig’ episode? Or is ‘Olivia’ more your style of pork?
Want more Top 5? Check out my Top 5 Dance Movies (more watermelon, less ham, but with a dash of Kevin Bacon).
And flogging my blog on Friday with Grace: http://www.withsomegrace.com.